“Stairs can’t stop me.”
I have never heard anything said with such indignant conviction. And I really wasn’t questioning the stairs’ motives. They weren’t acting against Alex in any way. No more than gravity was, a moment later.
If I have to lay blame, I’ll go with the half-finished mojito he was holding when we walked into N’s Pub that night. And although I didn’t personally see it, I’m told the two bottles of wine he drank earlier that evening may have had a hand in it as well.
If you’re going to nitpick, I suppose that Alex willingly consumed every bit of it himself. But it seems unfair to blame him.
Flying squirrels are not capable of powered flight like birds or bats. [Source: Wikipedia]
The flying squirrel costume added a sense of theatrics. The Korean passersby may even have believed it was part of a performance. He certainly stayed true to character.
He flew fully laid out, like a gymnast. He displayed extraordinary confidence by not raising either an arm or a hand to brace the landing. And he stuck the dismount without a wobble or a broken nose. Not many have caught falls with their faces so elegantly or with such style.
Miraculously, no bones were broken, no scratches raked across his face, and the costume was free from tears or stains. After a few minutes, grunts of consciousness kept us from undue worry. He stood by himself, if not happily, then triumphantly.
Alex had been right, after all. The stairs had not stopped him. If anything, they propelled him. Propelled him from “Alex Gould, The Man in the Costume” to “Alex Gould, Legend.”
Read more Alex Gould ridiculousness in Teddy Bears vs Dinosaurs
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